Immortal
by Baine
Summary: To be immortal: It is truly the blessing everyone seems to think it is, or a curse in disguise?


Immortal (1/1)

By Baine

Email: lady_

Posted: October 12, 2002

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Comments, flames, critiques, etc can be sent to lady_ ^_^

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Special thanks:

Azurite-What WOULD I do w/o you? You gave me the confidence to post this, that's for sure! ::whimpers:: You're SCARY! ^.~ Thanks for being the best Beta ever! ::mega glomp.

Jen-Wow. No WONDER you're my sister! You're amazing! ::squeals and hugs:: Thanks for going out of your way to edit this for me! I swear, one day soon I'm gonna find me a permanent editor! ::winks:: (Do you think she could edit THAT sentence? ::Grins innocently:: )

Ely-Once upon a time, you told me about the legend behind your name. The Elysian Fields. And my brain retained the info ^.~ Arigatou!

Stormie--You rock! Thanks for the last minute FB! You're the greatest! (Now you get to read "AWY"....Andi threatened me....! ::gulps:: ) Now go write, I've kept ya long enough! ^.~

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I was born an immortal, a direct descendant of the Moon Goddess Selene. Cursed to live for eternity, I will never die a natural death. There are only two things with the ability to kill me: a blade made of Godsteel or the right amount of black magic. The only time these methods don't work is when the Silver Crystal is around to counteract what has occurred.

Truthfully, I should be dead right now. I have died by both methods in the past. Instead, I am trapped in an endless abyss for the rest of time. Every time I have died at the hands of black magic, the Crystal has resurrected me.

As for Godsteel? The Legendary Sword was created from the ancient magicks and, by my own hand, I've killed myself twice because I cannot bear to live without Endymion. When he died at the hands of Beryl, what else could I do but kill myself? Of course, the Silver Crystal resurrected me then as well.

After my second attempted suicide, Luna took the sword away from me. I imagine she called upon the Ancient Gods to destroy the blade so I could never again use it on myself.

Black magick has been gone from the galaxy for 10,000 years now. Everyone I have ever loved and cared for is dead, even Endymion. The Silver Crystal only prolongs life; it grants immortality only to its bearer.

Me.

The Apocalypse was 10,000 years ago today. Earth faced her strongest enemy ever and was destroyed in the process. Among all our skilled warriors, even those from the farthest end of the galaxy are dead. Since that fateful battle on Earth, the majority of her inhabitants were also killed.

With my daughter by my side and the help of my faithful Crystal, we destroyed the second uprising of Chaos in an apocalyptic battle that determined our future. In the end Earth was a wasteland; the galaxy lay in shambles.

Even The Legendary Cauldron was affected, losing its guardian in a rare battle. Everyone we knew and loved was dead, as were many others. All who died not only to protect my world, but to stop Chaos before she could spread her evil throughout the galaxy.

Everyone gone except us. We had survived. Because of the Crystal, the always-dutiful Silver Crystal.

It was time for my daughter to ascend my throne, to become Queen of Earth, with Elios at her side as King. Together, they re-built the Earth, and once more it was prosperous.

As for me? I accepted the tedious position as Guardian of the Cauldron. Now I know exactly how Pluto feels as the eternal Guardian of Time and Space. To be in a place you can never leave due to the importance of your position.

I am the guardian of the stars, of life itself. Trapped in an eternal limbo, alone with nothing but my memories to keep me company. My memories of a time long past...

Faces, places, everything and everyone I ever held near and dear. I hold to them tightly. If I don't, they begin to fade before disappearing entirely.

I am haunted by my past.

I am haunted by _him_.

I am immortal; I can never pass on to the Elysian Fields to rest in peace with my friends and family.

Today is worse than most for it is the anniversary of the day I became Guardian. June 30th, my birthday. Years are no longer of any consequence, only the memories of events long past.

A lone tear trails my cheek in remembrance and I close my eyes against the onslaught of memories that pass before me. I hear a shuffling sound behind me and whirl around, my eyes springing open once more.

A figure stands before me, cloaked in darkness save for the aura of light surrounding her. My first thought is that she is an angel. But no, I am only hallucinating, dredging up visions to compensate for my loneliness.

Or am I?

She steps towards me and smiles softly. "...Mama?" It _is_ my daughter, come to visit for the first time since I myself arrived here.

"You aren't real, you're a hallucination." I shake my head violently, willing the ghost of my past to haunt me no more. Every time I had one of these visions that raised my hopes, I'd be forced back into reality, each episode more painful than the last.

"But I'm not." She places her hands upon mine, filling me with her warmth.

"You've never come before." I stare at her in shock, still unwilling to believe that this is real, that she is actually here.

"You know as well as I why not. I'm not permitted to set foot in the Cauldron during ordinary circumstances unless it is for Eternity."

"Something has happened." I clutch her hands in my own, unwilling to hear what horror had torn the Earth asunder this time.

"No, Mama. You've been here 10,000 years now. It is time for you to move on and for me to take your place as Guardian of the Cauldron."

"You don't want this life, it is lonely and—"

"It is my time. My daughter is now Queen."

Her daughter? My heart twinged, for I'd never even had the chance to meet her. My duty as Guardian had stripped even the basest of pleasures from me. I couldn't allow my daughter to go through the same banal existence I'd brought upon myself, especially now that she had a family of her own to watch grow up and flourish.

"This is no place for you," I argued, "you will regret—"

"No regrets, Mama. Never. Remember?" Tears well up in her eyes and she brings her hand out from behind her back. She holds the Legendary Sword, the sword Luna had supposedly destroyed all those years ago. "I'm so sorry, Mama..."

She raises the sword by its hilt and aims it for my heart. As the ancient blade pierces my skin, I feel no pain. I am bathed in a warm, glowing light. "I love you..."

Love.

Gasping in shock, I raise my hand to my sticky chest and stagger backwards towards the Cauldron I have sworn to protect. I gaze into her tearful eyes. All I can see is love...and peace?

No regrets. My last conscious thought is, _I love you, daughter..._

And I find myself falling, falling...

Into Elysian?

Into the Cauldron, to be born anew? I know not. All I know is a blissful rush of peace as my body is engulfed by the song of the stars. Finally I am at peace.

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Faces I remember...

I still see

Places in a memory...

Hold on to me

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Promises to tell me,

In a thousand ways

Moving on forever,

Living life this way

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And I can't wait to crawl

I can't wait at all

I can't wait to crawl

I can't wait anymore...

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'Cause if I wait too long,

I'm never gonna reach my destination

Now I know the time has come

It's all right (alright?) here

Yeah, it's all so clear to me

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Eyes that open slowly...

It's so hard to see

I've never seen an angel,

But I'm trying to believe

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And I can't wait to crawl

I can't wait at all

I can't wait to crawl

I can't wait anymore...

I can't wait anymore....

I can't wait anymore......

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Isn't that song just so perfect for this story? I found the single when I was cleaning my room. It's "Crawl" by The Way. I got it after hearing it on one of the WB's promo spots a few years ago. Does anyone else remember it or am I showing my age...? ^^;;;

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Originally Written: July 6, 2002

~~Disclaimer: You're going to make me say it. Drats. Well, "Sailor Moon" isn't mine. :P

(Like it? Hate it? I'm the one to talk to! Email lady_ today!)

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BAINE

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